It’s Ok To Not be Ok


I sat here this morning debating over what to write about.  I have been doing my best to try to write positive messages to help motivate you (and myself) in the midst of all this chaos.  I want to encourage people to see the good that is coming out of this because there really is so much greatness going on all around us.  School, sports, work, and many other things may be canceled, but there are so many things that aren’t canceled.  I want you all so see that hope is not canceled. Family is not canceled. Friendships are not canceled. Our precious time is not canceled.  All of those things are true, and I know it.  I feel it in my bones. That is the message I want to share with all of you, but I have to be truthful with you, too. I just can’t do it today.  I don’t have a positive message in me at this very moment. I’m human.  I am riding on the struggle bus today for sure. Some days just aren’t great. This is hard, and some days it gets the best of me.  Today is one of those days.  I’m just not feeling it.  It doesn’t help that I didn’t sleep well last night, have a migraine, and it is gloomy outside.  I am having a real hard time putting on my rose-colored glasses right now. It is what it is.  I think we are all going to have days that we struggle during this crazy time. It is only natural when you are faced with something like we are dealing with right now with this virus. I honestly think it is ok to have a bad day every now and then as long as you don’t get stuck in it. This is hard. None of us have ever experienced anything like it before. Not knowing when it will end is bound to cause some anxiety in us all. I know that there are people who are out of a job and some families are worried about making ends meet. I know parents are struggling with homeschooling their kids.  I know that the fear of the unknown is real. It’s ok to not be ok. Temporarily! What is not ok is dwelling on that fear and anxiety and letting it rule your life.  One bad day every now and then is not the end of the world. You are entitled to have those on occasion. Today is my day. I am going to feel my feelings and then I am going to get over them and move on. 

Our governor issued a stay at home order yesterday effective immediately through June 10. Thinking about being stuck at home for that long is very daunting. I feel like I am starting to go a little stir crazy already. I have left the house only a couple of times since March 12 (The day school was abruptly closed), and that was only for quick trips to get groceries. Other than that, I have been at home in my house.  I feel like I am running out of ideas for things to cook and we are going to start on a rotation of foods that we are eventually going to get tired of. I am also struggling on what to do about my girls’ Easter baskets this year and my oldest daughter’s 16th birthday.  I am worried about my sister who is nurse practitioner. I am worried about the health of my grandparents and parents and father-in-law.  I am worried about my friends that are struggling.  I am worried. Period. Again, though, I think that is only natural given the circumstances.  It’s ok not to be ok. What is important is how you deal with those feelings.  

While I think that the positive, sugar-coated messages are important. I think it is also important to be realistic.  We are living in scary times and sometimes we are going to have bad days.  It is ok to have all these feelings.  There is nothing wrong with you or me for having them.  Our fears, anxiety, frustrations, and even anger are valid. It is ok to feel them all. Just remember too, though, that we are all in this together.  We have to support one another and lift each other up when we are having those bad days.  Call and check on your friends, neighbors, and family members. Send a funny meme or text to someone.  Write a letter (yes, I mean actually write it with a pen or pencil) and mail it to people. Just letting those you love know that you care could make the difference in someone having a bad day or a good day.  Try not to dwell on all the negatives.  Choose to be grateful instead of complaining.  Take the time to rejuvenate yourself.  Take a long shower or bath just to get away from the chaos for a few minutes.  Ask for help when you need it.  Understand that it is ok not to be ok.  It is not ok to get stuck in it. Feel your feelings and then move on. That is what I am going to do. Hang in there and know that you aren’t alone even though it may feel like it right now. We will get through this!


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