Sparkalaphobia

I woke up this morning and one of my friends had sent me this meme about glitter.  It is probably the 10th time someone has sent it to me, and I have gotten many others just like it a million times.  I even get videos of people opening glitter bombs or of glitter paint on walls sent to me by my friends.  Whenever there is something on Facebook about glitter, people tag me in it.  Why would I get so many things sent to me about glitter you ask? Well, I absolutely HATE glitter. Yes, I am a female. Yes, I have two daughters. Yes, I was an elementary teacher. Yes, I love crafting. I should love glitter, right? Wrong! I cannot stand it. I hate how it gets everywhere and you can’t get rid of it. It stays around for months and appears out of nowhere at random times.  It is awful. Now I could say that many people would make those comments about not liking how it gets everywhere and it’s impossible to get rid of, but they would still use it and actually like glittery things. My dislike, though, goes much more extreme than that.  I really don’t like it and avoid it at all cost.  Maybe it is my type A personality or my OCD tendencies, but it just makes me crazy when I see glitter.  Maybe I have a glitter phobia.  Is that even a thing? I did see something once about sparkalaphobia.  If it is real, I definitely have it. Another part of my dislike comes from having hyperhidrosis, which is a sweating disorder that I was born with.  My hands and feet sweat constantly to the point of sweat dripping from them. It’s gross.  For most of my life it went uncontrolled and my hands were always soaking wet.  As you can imagine, that made glitter stick to me even worse than it does on dry hands.  Maybe that is where my dislike stems from.  Maybe there was a traumatic incident from my childhood that I blocked out. I don’t really know. I just know that I HATE it!

Anyone that is close to me knows how much I dislike glitter. It is certainly no secret.  As a teacher I avoided anything that had to do with glitter. Of course all of my assistants over the years were big glitter fans and seemed to always find ways to work it into some kind of project.  People even love to give me cards covered in glitter or gifts with glitter.  They think it is a fun joke, but it is not funny to me.  I’m serious. You may think that I just can’t take a joke, but that isn’t true.  I can joke with the best of them.  Glitter is just not one of those things I joke about, though. Thankfully my oldest daughter could care less about glitter so it was never an issue with her.  My youngest, on the other hand, is the girliest of girls and loves all things glittery. She especially loves glitter slime (let’s not even get into my similar dislike of slime).  I have tried many times over the years to avoid glitter in the house.  It has not been easy and it does make its way in every now and then.  I am like a maniac though and have strict guidelines on using it in the house.  Some may say that makes me a bad mom because I am squashing her fun or her creativity. Maybe I am. Maybe I am crazy. I just can’t help it.  I don’t like the stuff. Period! I know that I will continue to get picked on and tortured about glitter the rest of my life.  I will deal with it, but I don’t foresee anyone changing my mind. EVER. 

Anchored,

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